Questions
by Rainb0wNinja
Summary: You know, of all the crazy, messed up things I've done in my life, I've never once stopped and wondered, how did it come to this? But looking into a pair of all too familiar blue eyes hovering over me, I couldn't help but ask myself that question. How the hell DID this happen? High school AU, rated for drug/alcohol use, language, and yaoi.
1. Chapter 1

**Another HS fic featuring GrimmIchi... There will be foul language, drug/alcohol use, yaoi, and mild Orihime bashing. Or severe... We'll see. So, if you like her, you've been warned. Proceed with caution.**

**UPDATE: So I had to upload this again because apparently it got taken down at some point. I didn't even notice. Hopefully the admins don't notice it's back up.. If I suddenly disappear from this site, you can all assume they caught and banned me. But that shouldn't happen. Hopefully..**

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><p><em>You know, of all the crazy, fucked up things I've done in my life, I've never once stopped and wondered, how did it come to this? But looking into a pair of all too familiar blue eyes hovering over me, I couldn't help but ask myself that question. How the hell did this happen? This guy is practically my brother, so then why are we fucking each other in my bed? Why am I enjoying it so damn much? I don't regret it, definitely not, but it's pretty crazy that it's happening. Maybe we had too much to drink at that party, or maybe we're both still high as shit, or maybe... We've just been inching closer to this moment for a long time. But I should probably start from the beginning. It all started about a month back, and at the time I was just getting over a breakup with this midget girl, who is also one of my good friends.<em>

...

The last bell of the day sounded, signaling the students at Karakura High School to gather their things and flood out of the classroom, already talking about their weekend plans. In the midst of it all was me, Ichigo Kurosaki, and next to me was my ex girlfriend/friend/stalker, Orihime Inoue, my other friends Chad and Uryu, and my most recent ex, Rukia Kuchiki. Orihime was talking excitedly about going to some club with Rukia, but I wasn't really paying attention. Orihime kinda... Talked a lot. Eventually you just had to tune her out before you went crazy. She's a nice girl, she's just a little odd. And super clingy. Instead I focused on what Chad and Uryu were talking about.

"I have to study all weekend for that math test, I don't have time to go out." Uryu said, pushing his glasses back up to the bridge of his nose. Uryu was pretty much a nerd. Not the kind that are too weird to talk to, he was cool sometimes, but when we all went partying he stayed home and studied or practiced sewing. Yeah, the guy sews, I know. Weird.

"I'll probably stay in too. My Abuelo needs help at his store." Chad responded, his deep voice set in a monotone. Chad was one of my oldest friends, and while he didn't usually say much, he was the best friend a guy could have. He once saved me from a group of douchebags who were kicking my ass, and ever since then we've been close.

"You guys are no fun! Rukia, you'll come, right?" Orihime asked, pouting at Rukia who smiled nervously.

"Sorry, Inoue, but I've got a date." She said, and I took that as my cue to leave. I knew Orihime would ask me to go next, which I didn't want to go anyways, and I also didn't want to hear about Rukia's new boyfriend. Since there was nothing else to do, I decided to just head home. Might as well get some rest before tonight. The Vizards were having a party over at their house/orphanage. You might be asking, how can an orphanage have a party? Well, let me explain something about the Vizards. They grew up at this orphanage, which is really more like a run down warehouse. This old guy, Hachigen Ushoda, owns the place and is like their dad. He originally started it off as an orphanage, but once he got used to the kids, he decided to just keep them as his own and make it their house. But they still take in kids sometimes. They also throw the best parties.

Just as I approached the gate of the school, I was promptly punched square in the back, hard enough to probably leave a bruise. With a sigh/growl, I turned around and fixed my attacker with a glare, ready to knock him out. My vision was then assaulted by blue and I instead chose to punch him in the chest. No matter how many times he does it, I always think it might be some other asshole looking for a fight. He grinned at me and started walking, as if nothing had ever happened, and began talking about tonight.

"I just talked to Shinji, he said he invited the usual crowd. You know what that means?" He asked, giving me that look that just promised trouble. I rolled my eyes but smiled anyways. He may be an ass, but he's my brother. Well, not by blood, but he's been living with me since the third grade. Maybe I should introduce him a bit better. Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez, probably the most popular and most douchey guy in Karakura High. Known for his silver tongue and top notch skills in football and all other things athletic, among a very long list of other things.

"No, Grimmjow, I don't know what that means. But I'm sure you'll tell me anyways." I replied, knowing that he was probably not listening. When Grimmjow wanted to talk, he would talk until his face matched his hair. Another thing he was known for, having naturally blue hair and matching eyes to boot.

"Damn right I'll tell you. What it means, Ichi, is that all the bitches will be there. You know I love my bitches." He said, grinning lecherously. I laughed at this, having predicted that answer.

"Haven't you already slept with every girl in school?" I asked, stifling a laugh as an old woman gave us a dirty look. Guess she heard that. Oh well.

"All the good ones, sure, but what's wrong with a second go? Now that I know how they all are in bed, I can go back and re-fuck the best ones. Maybe Yoruichi, she was a fucking freak. Or Halibel, or Rangiku.. And what about you, Ichigo? It's time for you to move on and get some ass." He said, making me want to groan. As soon as Rukia dumped me, Grimmjow started pressuring me to find someone else.

"I'll move on when I'm good and ready. We barely broke up a week ago.".

"You sound like a bitch. If I were you, I would've already moved on at least four times. You guys only went out for like, a month, you should be happy to be free!"

"She left me for my brother, dude, it's a little hard to move on." I replied with a scowl. It's not like I planned on being with her for long, but I did like her a lot. It hurt when she just up and left me for him.

"Well, he's not really your brother." Grimmjow said, looking thoughtful. "You guys have different mom's."

"Still, Kaien is like.. My half brother or some shit. Step brother? I don't fucking know."

"And you shouldn't care. He's a dick, she's old news, let's go get some pussy." Grimmjow said, clapping me on the shoulder and walking up to our front door. I watched as he cracked his fingers, put his ear up to the door, and oh-so-carefully opened it. He cautiously peered inside before opening the door all the way, taking a step inside, only to to narrowly dodge a punch, which I ended up taking.

"GRIIIIIMMMMJOOOWWWW! IIIICHIIIGOOOO! My beautiful sons are home!" The obnoxiously loud voice of my dad yelled, the asshole dodging my kick to his face. He ran back inside, having greeted us as usual, leaving me to nurse my bleeding nose. Why do _I_ always end up getting hit?!

"Oi, goat face! You almost got me that time!" Grimmjow yelled after my idiot dad. I followed him inside, quietly grumbling about my face. I swear, if he left a mark on my face I _will_ kill him. How am I supposed to find someone and move on with a giant bruise on my face? "Where's Karin and Yuzu?" I heard Grimmjow ask, and belatedly noticed my sisters weren't around.

"Karin went to soccer practice, and Yuzu went out to buy some groceries for dinner. Will you two be home?" My dad asked, giving us a knowing look. We didn't even have to answer before he was calling Yuzu and telling her not to buy that much food. "Be careful tonight. Those Vizards can be a little too crazy sometimes." He said after hanging up. Grimmjow and I merely nodded, surprised at how serious he was being. "And remember... To use protection. I don't want grand children yet! That goes double for you, Grimmjow!" He yelled, ruining the serious moment. I really should have seen that coming.

"Don't worry old man, I'm not stupid. I wear protection... Most of the time." Grimmjow said, causing my dad to run over to the poster of my mom and cry. My mom died when I was little, and ever since then my dad's kept this giant picture of her up in the living room. It's weird, but it is nice to see her every day. Sometimes I wonder if it makes Grimmjow sad though. He never knew either of his parents, since they gave him to the orphanage when he was a baby. He pretty much grew up with the Vizards, until I met him in elementary school. We actually got into a fight, and ended up going to my dad's clinic to get fixed up. We ended up getting along really well, and he eventually just moved in with us.

"And you don't need to worry about Ichi, half of the time he's the one getting fucked... If you get what I mean." He added with a grin, causing me to blush and punch him in the face. Ah, I probably should have mentioned that earlier. I'm.. Bisexual, I guess you could say, though I don't like being called that. I just like people for who they are, gender doesn't matter. And Grimmjow loves teasing me about it.

"Don't be embarrassed, son! Daddy loves you no matter what!" My dad said, and I decided against using more violence. They wouldn't shut up anyways. So, I just went up to my room, which was also Grimmjow's room, I guess. He kind of sleeps in my closet. Sounds weird, I know, but our house isn't that big so we had to create a makeshift bed. It's small for a big guy like him, but he doesn't complain so I assume it works.

Checking the time, I realize I should probably get in the shower and start getting ready.

As I walked into the bathroom, I wondered exactly who would be there tonight. Shinji did say everyone, but did that really mean _everyone_? The last time he had that many people over... Shit, I can't even remember what happened. Tonight would be one hell of a time then. Hopefully nothing too crazy happens.. Yeah, right, who am I kidding. Shits gonna be crazy. All I remember before blacking out last time was Grimmjow taking Yoruichi and Rangiku into someone's room, Nnoitra getting punched in the face by Renji, Rukia passing out on the couch, and then.. I think I started making out with someone. Never did find out who though. My ass hurt like a bitch when I woke up though, so I'm guessing things went further. I should probably be careful tonight... But alcohol doesn't really mix well with me. Neither does weed. I kind of turn into a... Ah, well, you'll see later. Trust me.

I quickly washed my hair and got out of the shower, drying off in a half assed manner and then throwing on some clothes. I just wanted to get there already. Walking into my room, I realized Grimmjow must feel the same, since he practically ran into the bathroom to get ready. That guy... Sometimes I question his sanity. We're so alike though, I guess I should question my own sanity too. He's funny as hell when he's drunk though. Even more when he's high. But when he's both? God help us all. I've never seen someone as horny as him. It's weird he's not bi or something, he's such a damn whore. You'd think he'd take whatever he could get. But I guess that's just me.

Rummaging through Grimmjow's stuff, I take a condom, just in case I do end up with a girl. I'm not trying to have a kid at my age. Hell, I don't know if I ever want kids. What if I end up with a guy? I guess we could adopt or something, but kids are a lot of work. Good God.. What if Grimmjow had a kid? The horror.. I'd better keep an eye on him tonight. He might say he wears condoms, but sometimes I doubt it. He gets so out of it I don't think he even realizes what he's doing. It's actually a miracle he hasn't gotten someone pregnant yet.

"Let's go already!" Grimmjow's voice nearly scares me to death as he runs into the room, hair a dripping mess. I shake my head at his antics, throwing him a shirt to dry his hair. He hastily shakes the water off, reminding me of a dog, and grabs some gel to keep it in place. His hair always looks messed up, but it oddly fits him. I guess I'm not one to talk though. At least he uses gel. "Don't just stand there, Ichigo! It's time to go!" He yells, dragging me out of my room before I can respond. We don't even say goodbye to my dad as he races out of the house, and continues to drag me all the way to the Vizards, which is pretty damn far. By the time we get there the sun has already began to set, and we can here the music pounding from inside. It looks like we aren't the first to arrive. The garage door which is also the _only_ door is opened slightly, giving us some room to duck under and enter the house. Nearly everyone in our grade was there, and the entire warehouse already smelled like booze and weed.

Yep, tonight would be fun.

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><p><strong>I wonder what's going to happen? XD<strong>


	2. Chapter 2

**Here comes chapter 2~ :D**

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><p><em>Looking back, I really should have taken it easy. That night held more significance than I realized. Even now, I'm barely coming to terms with it. I did mention that I turn into a different person when I drink or do drugs. Well, now you'll see what I mean. After we got to the Vizards, things escalated rather quickly. Grimmjow had a few shots of what I assumed to be tequila, and I chose to avoid alcohol and smoke some weed. Not too long after that I ran into Shinji, a fan of a little thing called lean, also known as codeine. A had a sip of that, and then things got a little.. Messed up. It wasn't the last time I ran into Shinji, either. But you'll find out about that later. Let's just start with where I had the lean.<em>

...

"Damn, where tha fuck did Nnoitra go? He took the rest of that joint.." I grumbled, the effects of that codeine starting to hit me. I always needed a hit after sipping on that shit, it kinda freaks you out at first. Everything just... Slows down. Weed calms you down though, unless some asshole like Nnoitra takes it.

"He's over there with Nelliel." Grimmjow said next to me, downing another shot. He didn't look too pleased about that. "Guess she's off the market tonight." He sighed, eyes sweeping the room for another target. Nelliel and Nnoitra were a couple, I guess, but they broke up a lot. Like, every other minute. I'm exaggerating, but only a little. They argue soo much. I really don't know why she likes him, he's a prick, but ever since elementary school she's liked him. He's always kinda hated her, yet he still keeps her around. Whether it's for sex or something else, I don't know. She's such a nice girl too, it's almost hard to call her a whore. But.. She'll jump into bed with someone else even if she's with Nnoitra. It's happened a lot. They're just... A weird couple.

"Looks like I'm going with Rangiku." Grimmjow said, grinning lecherously. I shook my head at him, pointing over to where Rangiku was currently sitting on a certain someone's lap.

"I don't think so. Look who's back." I said, and Grimmjow promptly frowned. Gin Ichimaru, the most mysterious guy in Karakura. He's hardly ever around and nobody knows where he goes, but one thing we do know, is that Rangiku is _his_ property. Sure, she sleeps around too, but he let's her. As long as he's not around while it happens. The last guy who fucked her while he was in town disappeared and never came back. Another weird couple, but these two at least love each other.

"Dammit! Alright fine, Yoruichi then." He said angrily, looking around for the purple haired beauty. As soon as he spotted her, his grin came back full force. "Perfect. She's trying to get at that Soi Fon bitch." He said, watching as Yoruichi caressed the other girls blushing face. Soi Fon was a strange one, who was obsessed with Yoruichi, and nobody else.

"What makes you think that's going to work?" I asked, gulping as Yoruichi licked Soi Fon's neck. Yoruichi was just... Something else.

"You know she's a freak. I'm going for a threesome." He said, surprising me a little. He must already be drunk if he thinks he's getting in between a lesbian and... Whatever Yoruichi was.

"But Soi Fon hates guys. How do you plan on convincing them?"

"Oh, I'll convince them alright. Don't you worry about that, Ichi. Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got some ass to get." And with that, he downed a few more shots and wobbled over to the two. Shaking my head, I turned to go find Nnoitra to get some more weed, but was met with the grinning face of Shinji. He held out a plastic red cup, full of some unknown liquid, and had a mischievous grin on his face.

"We meet again, berry-tan. Want some?" He asked, making me blush a little. Shinji and I had... Somewhat of a past. He was the first guy I ever experimented with, and was one of the gayest guys in school, though he didn't look it. I'm also convinced he gets me drugged up on purpose and then takes advantage of me.

"That better not be alcohol, man, you know I can't drink right now. You trying to kill me?" I ask, eying the cup warily. One thing you never do while leaning is drink alcohol.

"I'm offended you ask, dear, I know lean better than anyone. Why do you think I'm offering you more?" He said, winking at me playfully. I smile and take a sip, blinking as everything slowed down again. This shit always scares me, I don't know why I do it.

"How about we go somewhere more.. Private? I've got some kush in my room, if you need to relax a bit. Lean can be a bit intense sometimes." He says, and I can only manage to shake my head and let him lead me upstairs to his room. It felt like forever, climbing those stairs, but I knew it was only a few seconds. I also knew we weren't just going in there for weed. I agreed though, because I need to calm down. And, looking downstairs, I see Rukia making out with Kaien, and realize I also deserve some ass too. And Shinji would give me some whether I needed it or not.

"Here, love, have some of this." He said, and I blinked as I realized we were already sitting on his bed. I gratefully accepted the joint and took a long hit, letting myself relax some. My body felt so numb right now, and I somehow felt like I was smiling, even though I couldn't even feel my face. I must look funny, since Shinji laughed at me and took a hit for himself. "You're always fun like this, Ichi-kun. I see Rukia got acquainted with your dear brother. Too bad for her." He says, and the room spins as I'm suddenly straddling his hips. Did I do that, or did he? Ah, who cares.

"I don't want to talk about her. In fact, no more talking. Let's do what you brought me up here for." I say, hardly believing those words could come out of my mouth. But, what can I say? I'm a whore when I'm like this. Every time I drink, smoke, lean, whatever. I get like Grimmjow, and become a horny ass mother fucker. Not the best quality, but whatever. I don't care right now.

"Yes, dear, let's." Shinji purrs, and suddenly we're kissing, taking off each others clothes. Things get blurry here and there, but before I know it, I'm kneeling between his legs and sucking like my life depends on it. My mouth is so numb, I can't even tell if I'm doing a good job. It's been a while since I've given someone head. But, from the sounds he's making, I guess I'm still pretty damn good at it. I space out again, but suddenly my mouth has a bitter taste and it's wetter than before. Even though he came, I keep going, until he pulls me up and switches positions. I groan as he eagerly takes me into his mouth and repays the favor I gave him. Finally, _finally_ I'm getting some damn release. Shinji knows how to give it to me, too, making this a whole lot better.

I don't remember much after that, it gets blurry again. I remember getting so close to blissful release, but then someone came in and ruined it..

Who else but Grimmjow.

He charged in like he owned the place, half naked, and pulled Shinji from my throbbing dick. If I wasn't so out of it, I would've beat the ever living shit out of him. But he had an interesting proposition.

"With me. Now. Yoruichi agreed to the threesome, on one condition. I bring someone else. You're the first person I thought of. Let's go make this a foursome." He said, and before I even pulled my pants up he dragged me out of the room. Luckily we only went a few rooms up so nobody saw us.

I remember seeing Yoruichi on the bed, shirt gone, and a less happy Soi Fon next to her.

Everything after that is just black.

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><p>Let's skip to the morning after. I woke up feeling drowsy, but unlike Grimmjow, I wasn't hungover. However, I didn't remember a thing from last night, other than going into that room with Grimmjow. Apparently we somehow made it back home though. If that wasn't disturbing enough, Grimmjow was laying on my stomach, half naked again. I could only wonder and dread how we got into this position, and hoped he wouldn't puke on me. But he needed to get off. What if my dad came in and saw us like this? Or Karin, or Yuzu? I unfortunately had to wake him up.<p>

"Oi.. Get up, asshole, I'm not a pillow." I said, poking his shoulder. He grumbled something but didn't wake up, so I started shaking him, until finally he rolled off me and groaned. God, he better not puke on my bed!

"Stop.. Spinning... You prick..." He mumbled, squeezing his eyes shut. Now that he was laying on his back, I saw his chest, and all of the scratch marks and hickeys. Yoruichi must have really been a freak. Looking down, my eyes widened, as I realized my shirt was also gone and I too had various marks. Jesus, tell me I wore that condom! Reaching into my pocket, I sighed in relief, it wasn't there.

"Where.. Are we?" Grimmjow asked, obviously not wanting to open his eyes.

"Home," I replied, "Don't know how though. You remember anything?"

"You really think I'm gonna remember anything? You didn't even drink, and _you_ blacked out. The last thing I remember is... Telling Yoruichi to suck my dick. Did it work?"

"Uh, it more than worked. You don't remember her agreeing to have a foursome?" I asked, surprised that Grimmjow blacked out that early. I guess it's good that he doesn't remember walking in on me and Shinji.

"We had a _foursome_?! No fucking way! I can't believe I don't remember that! Wait, so who was the fourth person?" He asked, actually opening his eyes to look at me. I felt awkward, not knowing how to respond to that. He was the one who asked me, but he was waisted. Would he get mad?

"Uh.. Well.. About that. You kind of interrupted me and Shinji and made me go join you guys. I guess Yoruichi wouldn't do it unless you brought someone, so you brought me." I said, gauging his reaction. He looked shocked, then confused, and then... Curious?

"Oh. So... How was it?" He asked, and I almost gaped at him. How could he be so casual about that?!

"I don't fucking know, I blacked out after that." I replied, wincing as he sat up abruptly and started yelling, hangover be damned.

"You picked that moment to black out?! Are you kidding me?!" He yelled, grabbing my by the shoulders and shaking me. "That could have been the best experience of my life and neither one of us remembers it! Dammit Ichigo!"

"It's not my fault! I was doing my _own_ thing when _you_ interrupted, thank you very much! I should be mad at you!"

"Whatever! Just check your phone to see if there's anything that would help." He said, flopping back down and rubbing his eyes. I rolled my eyes and took out my phone, not surprised to see a few messages. All of which were from Shinji.

_Sorry we got interrupted, love, but it was still a good night! Can't wait for next time ;p_

There was a picture attached of Shinji lying naked in his bed, and I saved that to my phone before opening the next message.

_How fun~_

This picture was a bit more shocking. Apparently Shinji decided to watch us and took a picture of Yoruichi kissing Soi Fon while Grimmjow fucked her from behind. I blushed at how lewd it was, but was thankful I wasn't in the picture. Maybe I wasn't in the foursome after all?

_Ah, I'm jealous, berry-tan._

Or.. Maybe I was. This picture was the most shocking of all, and I must have gasped, since Grimmjow was looking at me. But I couldn't even look at him.. Not with all these memories coming back. And oh God, it was _bad_. Watching Yoruichi and Soi Fon have sex, then Soi Fon passing out, and then... Then Grimmjow fucked Yoruichi... But she asked us to do something for her. And we were so far gone.. We did it. She asked us to... To...

_"Kiss each other.. I wanna see it."_

Then Shinji took this damn picture. This picture that nobody else could ever see. Me and Grimmjow, stark naked, pressed against each other and kissing way too passionately while Yoruichi lay under us, watching us with a grin.

"Well? Anything?" Grimmjow asked, startling me so bad I dropped my phone. As soon as our eyes met, every single detail came rushing back, and I quickly ran out of the room as vomit made its way up my throat.

I kissed him.

Or did he kiss me?

It didn't matter, it was still wrong. Nobody could ever know about this. Especially Grimmjow. I had to delete that picture, now.

But wait, my phone-

"WHAT THE FUCK?! ICHIGO!?"

Oh God... Why..

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><p><strong>Hehe.. That escalated fast XD poor Ichigo, and poor Grimmjow! Things can only get better from now on!<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

_Words can't describe how I felt that morning. Even as Grimmjow dragged me back into our room I couldn't believe what happened. He had every right to be mad, I was too, and completely disgusted. I mean sure, Grimmjow is attractive. But he's my brother. It's almost like incest. Or at least, that's what I thought. What I didn't know is that this was only the beginning. I also didn't know that Grimmjow wasn't even mad about the kiss. But I was about to find out._

...

"The hell is wrong with you?" Grimmjow asked, my phone still in his hand. I looked up at him from the floor with a mixture of anger and confusion.

"What's wrong with _me_? What about _you_?! It was your God damned idea in the first place, you can't blame it all on me!" I yell, narrowing my eyes as he suddenly looked confused.

"What are you talking about?" He asks, "It wasn't my idea for you to let that bastard Shinji molest you."

Wait.. What?

"I'm not talking about Shinji! And he didn't molest me, you idiot! Can we just focus on what really happened? Why aren't you mad about the kiss!?" I ask, wanting to throw up again. Just thinking about it made me sick. I made out with my fucking brother!.

"Eh? You mean between you and me? We were blacked out, it's not like it meant anything. I don't even remember it. Just delete the picture and forget it. And delete this shit too!" He yells, showing me the picture of Shinji. I angrily grab my phone and glare at him.

"Why are you suddenly all over my ass about Shinji? And how can you not care about that picture!? We're practically related!"

"Which is why it doesn't matter. It was just a fuck up, it's not like we're gonna be all weird around each other. And why would I be okay with Shinji? The guys a perverted creep, and I thought you were done with him. I'm surprised you don't have herpes or something from him." He says, flopping back down on my bed.

"He's a good fuck, what can I say. You're the one who told me to get some ass." I shrug, deciding to just stay on the floor.

"Not from him! Anyone but him. Even someone as fucked up as Nnoitra would be better."

"Okay one, he's not gay and two, ew. Just no. And I'll be with anyone I want, thank you very much. I don't tell you how to live your life."

"Whatever. I'm just happy I fucked Yoruichi last night. Still, I wonder how we got here." He said, causing me to sigh in defeat. There was no point in arguing with him, he would blow it off anyways as if it were nothing.

"We probably did what we usually do. Stumble all the way over here like two dumbasses. At least we made it home." I say, and then it occurred to me, "Where the hell is the old man? He usually loves waking us up early when we're like this."

"Beats the hell out of me. It's a little too quiet down there though, I wonder if anyone's even home." He replies as he massages his temples, probably to get rid of a headache.

"I'll go check. I'm hungry anyways."

"Bring me something." He grumbled as I get up and leave my room. I grunt and walk downstairs, finding the living room completely empty. Checking the clock I realize it's already one in the afternoon and sigh in irritation. Waking up this late sucks. Walking over to the fridge, I grab some milk and then open the cupboard to get some cereal. As I make two bowls, I see a note on the kitchen table and walk over to read it. It's definitely Yuzu's handwriting, and she says goat face had some sort of doctors convention to go to and Karin went to soccer practice again. Yuzu herself went to help at Urahara's candy shop.

"That old pervert better behave." I grumbled, walking back upstairs with the cereal. Urahara was an old friend of my dad's, but he was also super weird and creepy. Not to mention perverted. I remember hearing that he helped start the Vizards orphanage, but I think it was just a rumor.

"Everyone's out today. Guess we have a quiet house for once." I say as I walk into my room. I give Grimmjow his bowl and then start eating, happy to get some food in my system.

"Thank God. I just checked Facebook to see if anything else happened last night. We missed a lot." He says, reminding me to check my page. As I did, he filled me in. "Apparently Ikkaku and Yumichika got into some fight, and then _made up_ on the floor. There was a dance battle that Love won, but that isn't surprising. That guy knows how to dance."

"Renji actually fought Nnoitra?" I ask, looking at the picture of the two punching each other. "I wonder why."

"It's not the first time. I guess Nelliel was all over Renji's dick and it pissed Nnoitra off for whatever reason, so they fought. I think Renji won. But who really knows." He says as I keep scrolling through all of the posts. I make a noise of disbelief as I see a picture of a certain dark haired beauty and his silver haired lover.

"Shuuhei was there?! How did I miss that? Aw, dammit!" I swear, pouting over how delicious he looked.

"Don't tell me you still want his ass. He's completely committed to Kensei, and vice versa. They've got matching tattoos and everything."

"I know, and it's a damn shame. He didn't get that 69 tattoo for nothing! Ugh, it's not fair. He's perfect." I say, saving the picture to my phone.

"You're such a damn fruit, I swear. Oh, I guess Rukia's brother showed up and dragged her out before she could suck your brothers dick." He said, showing me a picture of what looked like Rukia, but it was blurry.

"Byakuya? Damn, that sucks. He's scary as shit." I say, almost feeling bad for her. But then again, I'm glad Kaien didn't get any.

"Ha! That emo kid Ulquiorra was there! Who the hell invited him?" Grimmjow says, laughing at what I assumed to be a picture of Ulquiorra. "That freak Szayel was there too. Tch, Shinji needs to learn how to invite people. You leave the weirdos _out_."

"Be nice, asshole. I can't believe we missed all of this. Next time let's try to not black out."

"You say that every time. Next week we'll be doing the same thing we are now, just like always." He says, causing me to frown. He was right.

"Next week? He's having another party already?" I ask in disbelief. He usually only did this once a month.

"Guess so. He says he's not inviting as much people though."

"Maybe we won't black out then."

"Be realistic, Ichigo. We will always black out no matter what."

"... I still can't believe Shuuhei was there."

"Shut up already, pansy!"

* * *

><p>That day was uneventful, as was Sunday, so I'll just fast forward to Monday. I really didn't want to be at school, it was so boring. We're graduating in a few months and it feels like it's going by so slow. All I do these days is listen to music and sleep in class. My grades are good enough to the point where even if I don't do any work, I'll still pass. Maybe that's why Shinji keeps throwing parties, to help time go by faster. Speaking of Shinji.. He hasn't stopped staring at me since class started. It's making me nervous, because I know he remembers what happened. And he's not the only one. I'm pretty sure Soi Fon hates us more than ever now, and Yoruichi is now after not only Grimmjow, but me as well. She's always been after Grimmjow actually, but now it's worse. Not that he cares. I can't say I care either, but it's a little weird when she looks at both of us and winks, like she wants to see us kiss again. Not gonna happen.<p>

Grimmjow acts like nothing happened, surprisingly. Normally he would brag to the entire school if he got laid, and considering it was a foursome, I figured he would do it even more. But he hasn't brought it up even once. I'm assuming it's because he doesn't want anyone knowing I was the fourth person. I don't want anyone knowing either, it's bad enough Yoruichi remembers it. In fact, it's a shock she hasn't told everyone. My gut tells me something bad is going to come from this, and at lunch, I realized I was right. Yoruichi pulled Grimmjow and I off to the side, where nobody could hear us, which was a bad sign already.

"I have a proposition for you two." She started, and my stomach was already clenched with nervousness. "I'm sure you two remember Friday night, and I'm sure you've also noticed that nobody else knows besides myself and Soi Fon. Well, and Shinji, but he's part of this deal too."

"What are you getting at?" I ask, wishing she would just magically forget.

"I'm getting there, strawberry. You see, I love gossiping. It's killing me that I haven't told anyone. But I realize it might be embarrassing for you two if everyone knew. I mean, you're almost brothers, and I know Grimmy here isn't gay and doesn't want anyone thinking he is. So, I won't tell anyone _if_ you two do me one last favor."

"What is it?" Grimmjow asks, looking skeptical. I can tell he's nervous too, since he knows better than anyone how much of a freak Yoruichi is. She could literally ask us anything right now.

"This Friday, you two do the same thing you did last time. Only this time, Shinji will be joining us. If you do that, we'll both stay quiet. But if you don't.. Those pictures will go around this entire school before you can even blink." She says, and I feel my jaw fall open. She had to be kidding.

"Why? Why the fuck would you want that?" Grimmjow asks, almost shaking with rage. He didn't like being trapped like this, and I couldn't blame him.

"Because it's hot, Grimmjow. It's been a while since I've been that turned on. It's not like you two have to fuck each other, I'm not that sick. Yaoi is delicious, incest isn't. Even though you aren't _technically_ related.. But still, all I ask is that you two get naked and have some fun with us. The most you have to do is kiss once."

"I'm not letting Shinji touch me." He growls, and I begin to wonder why he hates Shinji so much.

"Fine, he only wants Ichigo anyways. You can let me touch you. I know you like that. So, do we have a deal or not?" She asks, her yellow eyes shining with amusement. I felt like my stomach had just dropped down into my ass. This couldn't be happening. The first time was an accident, and it was bad, but doing it on purpose? Because we have no choice? I was suddenly starting to hate Shinji too, since something told me this was his idea, not just hers.

I looked at Grimmjow, who looked ready to punch something. I've never seen him look so conflicted before. Usually he wouldn't say no to her, but since she's involving two other guys and he's straight, I can understand the problem. Plus one of the guys is me. But if he says no.. Everyone will know what we did. I can't handle that. Nobody else can know I kissed Grimmjow.

"Fine." He grinds out, and Yoruichi grins.

"Great! Well, I'll see you both Friday then!" She says, walking away with a bounce in her step. Grimmjow and I stand there for a little longer, too shocked to say anything. I'm too scared to even look at him. Would this ruin our friendship? Make it weird? He said it didn't mean anything the first time, but it was an accident. This would be completely different.

"This is the last time I fuck with her." He grumbled, startling me a little. I hesitantly look at him, not surprised that he still looks pissed. I nod, understanding why he wouldn't want anything to do with her anymore.

"I'm done with Shinji too. This is just.. Too much."

"We'll just... Make it quick I guess. We'll get super waisted first, so we don't have to remember it. It won't be that bad... Maybe. I already said we won't be weird around each other, and I still mean it. This won't ruin anything. It's not like it turns us on." He says, and I grimace. Grimmjow? Turning me on? Sick.

"Absolutely not. It'll be like last time, and we'll be fine."

"Yep. No big deal."

"Not at all."

"Good. Now let's go eat before the bell rings." He says, and I follow him back into the lunch line. My mind was a mess, no matter how normal I acted. I didn't want to eat. I didn't want to see Shinji anymore, or Yoruichi, and I didn't want to go to that party. But I had no choice. And I hate that.

Something told me this would end up changing everything.


	4. Chapter 4

_That week went by way to fast. Before I knew it, we were right back in the orphanage getting shit faced. I drank more than I ever have before and almost considered doing lean. Maybe it would kill me and this wouldn't happen. But in the end, Yoruichi and Shinji got their way. And I unfortunately wasn't drunk enough. It was like God was messing with me. I was drunk to the point where I didn't care, I was horny, and I had no self control. But I was still aware of what was going on. Well, I won't spoil it for you. Let's start with Yoruichi dragging us into Shinji's room._

...

"I'm glad you came." She said to us, smiling in a way that should be sexy. And it probably would be if it wasn't me and Grimmjow being forced into this messed up foursome.

"Don't be shy loves, start stripping." Shinji said, looking at me specifically. My hands were shaking as I pulled my shirt off, and I was way too unbalanced thanks to the alcohol. I ended up falling onto the bed which only encouraged him. I heard Yoruichi say something to Grimmjow but I refused to look in that direction. I was trying to be in denial and convince myself it was just me and Shinji. It almost worked, until Yoruichi was suddenly laying next to me, completely naked. She looked at me deviously and then licked her lips, and I felt myself getting hard. I didn't want to, but it was beyond my control. I closed my eyes as I felt Shinji pull my pants off, and then the bed dipped on Yoruichi's side, and I knew Grimmjow had just gotten on top of her. I kept my eyes closed. Even as Shinji started sucking me off, I kept them shut. I tried to keep quiet, because letting Grimmjow hear me like that was too embarrassing. But damn.. Shinji knew how to suck.

"Why don't you let Ichigo on top, Shinji? I'd love to watch him." Yoruichi says, much to my dismay. I wouldn't have to look at Grimmjow, but we would be shoulder to shoulder, and that was still awkward.

"I love the way you think." Shinji replies, pulling me up and slipping underneath me. Everything spins for a second, but once I regain focus, I realize Grimmjow is already fucking Yoruichi. He's way too quiet, too, and for a second I almost look to see if he's okay. But then I remember not to do that.

"Come on now, don't be shy berry-tan. You've done this before. We just have guests this time." Shinji says, and something in me snaps as I feel the slightest brush of Grimmjow's skin against mine. Without even preparing him, I bury myself in his ass, wishing this would all be over. The sooner he cums, the sooner it ends. So I start going as fast as I can, completely unaware that Grimmjow is doing the same thing. My mind is so hazy, I almost can't feel anything, but I know it feels good. I know I'm probably making some sort of noise that I should be trying to hold back. But I don't care anymore.

"Ah, so rough! Someone's angry." Shinji says, his voice slightly breathless. But that smug grin doesn't go away. "Is my berry-tan mad?"

"He doesn't have a reason to be mad." Yoruichi says, staring right at me while Grimmjow pounds into her. "Not yet. We haven't even made them do anything to each other."

"You said all we had to do was kiss." Grimmjow suddenly growls, speaking for the first time. It surprises me enough to look at him, and I immediately blush and look away, something both Yoruichi and Shinji notice.

"You do. So then, why not do it? You both obviously want this to end, so give us what we want."

"Ne, that's not all I want, Yoruichi dear. Speak for yourself."

"It's not all I want either, but that's what they agreed to. We can't go back on our word now."

"We should have drugged them. Ichi here gets crazy when he's drugged up."

"Both of you shut up!" Grimmjow yells, "This is the most I've ever heard someone talk during sex! We're here for one reason, and you'll both get it. Just shut the hell up and wait."

"Mah, so angry. I like." Shinji purrs, but surprisingly stays quiet and urges me to continue. I reluctantly do so, but find my eyes wandering over to Yoruichi, who is making some interesting noises. Then I look lower, at her massive chest which is bouncing due to Grimmjow, and then lower, until my eyes widen dramatically. I shouldn't be looking at this, but my God, it's so... so...

"_Big_, ain't he? I was just thinking the same thing." Shinji says, startling me enough that I jump. I blush, realizing I was caught staring at Grimmjow's dick going in and out of Yoruichi. How the hell did that happen? Am I that drunk? I have to be. It's the only answer. I'm not curious or anything. "Why don't you touch it, Ichi?" Yoruichi asks, gasping as Grimmjow gives a particularly rough thrust.

"We're not doing that shit." He growls, and for some unknown reason his voice sends a shiver down my spine. I've never heard it so deep before, or so breathless. It's almost... No, not that. There's no way I just thought his voice was sexy. I must be really, really drunk. Maybe this isn't even happening. Maybe I blacked out and this is some fucked up dream. Yeah.. More denial. That always works. It doesn't matter what I tell myself, deep down I know the sick truth. I know that this bizarre situation is actually turning me on. Which is why even though I got caught, I'm suddenly looking at the same thing again, only this time my eyes keep going up. They go over the muscles on his back and side, the curve of his ass, His strong arms, and then his face, his hair, his eyes..

Which are staring right back at me.

Several things happened at that moment. The first was my cock twitched and I damn near lost it. Then everything slowed down, almost as if I were on lean. His eyes were so damn mesmerizing, I've never seen them like this. So full of emotion. I could hear my heart pounding, the music playing so loudly. It was that damn song by Beyoncé that just came out, Drunk In Love.

I didn't even realize we were kissing until the impossibly tight coil in my stomach snapped and I shot my load into Shinji, moaning ever so slightly as it happened.

Then finally, I blacked out. Took fucking long enough. But if you think it ends there, well, I wish you were right. But it definitely didn't end there. And I mean that in multiple ways. That terrible foursome didn't end until we all passed out, and I'm pretty sure I came five more times. But, something else happened. That forced, drunk, possibly accidental kiss set off a chain of events that led to Grimmjow and I fucking each other a month later. It formed emotions and feelings that I would keep bottled up inside, and it also changed something in Grimmjow. Something big. It took about two weeks for me to notice, so we'll just skip ahead to there.

* * *

><p>I thought it would have been awkward between Grimmjow and I, since we both remembered what happened. But nothings changed. We still act the same around each other, and I'm glad. It would suck if we stopped being friends. Yoruichi and Shinji kept their words and didn't tell anyone about what we did, and promised to never make us do it again. Grimmjow hasn't tried to fuck her again and I've been avoiding Shinji. Everything feels normal again, like nothing happened. Except maybe one thing. Grimmjow keeps.. Disappearing. Sometimes he'll go to the bathroom during class and won't come back until nearly a half hour later. Sometimes I can't find him after school and walk home by myself, which is unusual. And then other times he'll say he has somewhere to go and won't come back for hours. But he never tells me where he goes. Grimmjow never has been one to keep secrets, especially from me, so of course I'm worried. Does he not trust me after what happened? God, that would suck so bad.<p>

"Yo, Ichigo!" Someone yells, breaking me from my inner turmoil. I turn around and see Renji walking towards me with Rukia, Uryu, Chad and Orihime. "You're coming tonight, right?" He asks, and I have to rack my brain to remember what he's talking about. Wasn't there something going on tonight?

"Uh.. Yeah.. Where am I going again?" I ask, a little embarrassed that I couldn't remember. I've just been too distracted by Grimmjow to pay attention I guess.

"It's Ikkaku's birthday and Shinji offered their house, dumbass. Everyone's going." Rukia explained, causing my eyebrow to twitch.

"Thanks for reminding me, midget, and yeah I'm going." I reply, yelping as she promptly kicked me in the shin. "Dammit Rukia!"

"Awesome! Hey, can you ask Grimmjow if he's going? I haven't been able to get a hold of him lately." He says, and I bitterly remember that I haven't really talked to him either.

"Yeah, I'll ask him later." I say, deciding not to tell them I haven't seen him either. We do live together, so I'll have to see him sometime.

"Alright, cool. See you tonight then, strawberry!"

"You know it pineapple!"

Now I just had to find Grimmjow.

As it would turn out, Grimmjow really had disappeared. He wouldn't even answer my texts! So I ended up going to the party without him. Something told me he would be there anyways. But it was even more hard to find him since there were so many people here. I could hardly even move around, let alone look for him. But, by some stroke of luck, I spotted the unmistakable hair color upstairs. I wonder what he's doing up there? I thought the only thing up there was bedrooms. Tch, I bet he's after some girl again. Halibel did come back from her vacation to Mexico the other day, maybe that's why he's been gone. Maybe I should just leave him be. But something told me to go up there.. What should I do?

"Well hello there, darling." An unfortunately familiar voice said, causing me to frown. I knew I would run into him, like always, but I really didn't want to see him.

"No, Shinji." I say, turning to walk away. But he grabs me by the wrist and spins me around.

"Aw, don't be like that. You've been avoiding me for weeks, I miss my berry-tan." He says with a pout, keeping a firm hold on me even as I try to get away.

"I don't care, I'm looking for someone right now."

"For Grimm, ne? I already know. But he's been a bit shady lately, hasn't he? I'm sure you want to know why. After all, ya want him." He says, and I barely hold back the urge to punch him. He must have sensed my hostility, because he quickly puts his hands up in defense. "Easy now, I'm just trying to help. It's obvious you have feelings for him after what happened. I can see it in those pretty eyes of yours."

"You don't know anything."

"I know more than you think, Ichi-kun. In fact, I can tell you where he's been these past few weeks. Or you can go upstairs and find out for yourself." He says, and while I don't want to believe him, something tells me he really does know. He's Shinji.

"I already know he's with Halibel."

"Really? Because she's over there with her sisters." He points out, and I realize he's right. Halibel is standing with Mila Rose, Sun-Sun and Apacci. And Rangiku is with Gin. And Yoruichi is with Soi Fon. So then who? Nelliel? No, she's with Nnoitra. Who the hell is he up there with then? "Curious now, ain't ya? Go check. I guarantee you'll get plenty of answers." He says, and I don't exactly know what he means, but I know I have to check. Something is just screaming at me to go up there, so I do. I quickly make my way through the crowd, climb upstairs, and start checking all the rooms. They're all empty, except for the last one, which I just know he's in. But with who? What was I about to walk in on and interrupt?

Should I even be doing this? I mean, I _know_ him. So then why am I so worried? I haven't seen him in so long, and I guess it kind of... Bugs me that he won't tell me anything. And if opening this door will get me answers, then I have no choice.

"Grimmjow?" I ask as I push the door open. As soon as I see him, my heart stops. This.. Was not what I was expecting. This was just.. Unbelievable.

"I-Ichigo!" He gasps, quickly covering himself. But it was too late. I saw everything, and it was something I never thought would happen.

"Oi, close the door will ya? Either join in or get out." The voice of the other person said, and I promptly felt my heart shatter. I felt shocked, betrayed, and something else I couldn't describe. So this is where he's been, this entire time. This is what he's been doing. And with this person, who he knows I like. Why wouldn't he tell me this? Why would he even do this?

How could he have sex with..

"Shuuhei..."


	5. Chapter 5

_I've never left a party so fast in my life. Despite being a little tipsy I ran straight home, probably looking like some crack head. But I didn't care. I was so angry, so confused, and extremely hurt. The image of Grimmjow covering himself wouldn't leave me alone, and I didn't have to guess what Shuuhei had been doing between his legs. I'm glad I didn't see that much. But that was definitely his voice, I'd recognize it anywhere. It took the longest time for me to accept that it really happened, that it wasn't some twisted dream. It just wouldn't register in my mind that Grimmjow had been going behind my back and sleeping around with guys. That this whole time, that's where he's been, with God knows who else. Shinji knew an awful lot about it, so I'm guessing he also slept with Grimmjow. It just didn't make sense though. Grimmjow hated Shinji. He was completely straight. And he knew I really liked Shuuhei. Plus, wasn't Shuuhei with Kensei? What happened to being fully committed? I had a lot of questions, and that night, I got my answers._

...

It was late that night when Grimmjow finally made it home. I was sitting on the roof, a place I only went if I needed to think. Plus I really wanted to be alone and listen to depressing music. A little emo, I know, but dammit I really am hurt. This is probably the worst thing Grimmjow's ever done to me. I mean, it's one thing to start wondering if you're gay. I could have been there for him and helped him through it. But it's something else entirely to just ignore me and go fuck a bunch of dudes, including the one person I wanted to fuck. He didn't even tell me. When did he even start thinking about it, anyways? What made him change? He's always been into girls, hell he's slept with nearly every one of them in Karakura. Did he get bored or something? No, that's not a good enough reason. There's more. I want him to tell me, but at the same time I don't even want to look at him. Unfortunately, he knows me too well, and knows I'm sulking up here.

I watch as he climbs out of our bedroom window and then jumps up to sit next to me. I almost consider telling him to fuck off, or to shove him off the damn roof, but instead I stay quiet. He hates getting the cold shoulder anyways. I do however take out one headphone to hear if he has anything good to say. Out of the corner of my eye, I watch him struggle with what to say. I'm pleased to see guilt written all over his face, but it doesn't make me feel that much better.

"I know you're probably pissed at me right now.." He begins, and I resist the urge to scoff. Uh, probably? More like absolutely. I bite my tongue and let him continue. "I just...I don't know. Things have been weird lately." He says, and I decide to take pity on him. I remember when I first started looking at guys, and it had been confusing. But Grimmjow was there for me, so I'll be there for him too. Even if I do hate him right now.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I ask, deciding to start with that question. I had a lot more to go. He looks down, contemplating his answer for a moment. Then he let's out a sigh and shrugs.

"I didn't know how." He says. This earns him a punch in the arm.

"That's a lie. You're always straightforward, no matter what. Tell me the real reason. I haven't seen you for weeks, and now all of a sudden you're gay? Bi? What the hell are you, anyways?"

"I still like chicks." He grumbles, rubbing his arm, "But.. I like guys too. It just kinda happened and I didn't know how to deal with it. I couldn't even accept it at first."

"So then how did you end up with Shuuhei? And Shinji? Who else, Grimmjow?" I ask, my tone harsh. He looks down again and I feel some of my anger deflate. I've never seen him look so depressed before. "Look, just start from the beginning. When and how did this happen?" I asked, surprised when he blushed. I've never seen him blush.. I think. Not like this at least.

"Well.. It started after that night. You know.. When we had that foursome."

"Which one?" I scoff, slightly taken aback that he started thinking like this that long ago.

"With Soi Fon. At first I didn't care, even after I remembered everything. It was an accident. But then I started asking myself why I didn't care. I mean, if I'm straight, then shit like that should bug me, right? I should have been disgusted. But for some reason I didn't care. Then that other time with Shinji and Yoruichi.. It just made everything worse. I couldn't stop thinking about it. I didn't want to tell you because.. I thought you would stop talking to me or something." He explained, and I almost punched him again. But then it slowly started sinking in.

"Why would I stop talking to you?" I ask, a weird feeling settling in my stomach. Was he implying..?

"Because technically, you're the reason I started questioning myself. You're the one I kissed after all. I kept telling myself nothing would change, but inside everything changed." He replied, and I could only stare numbly at him as my brain processed everything. I'm.. The one who made him like guys? Does that mean he.. Likes me? But we're brothers! I could never...we couldn't...

"Calm down, I'm not saying I want your dick or anything. That would be too weird. It's just... It's hard to explain, alright? I'm still confused about it. After I started thinking about it, I went out and.. Tested it. With Shinji. I still hate him.. I don't even know why I went to him first. I guess because he's the only one who would do it and not ask any questions. After that things got a little.. Out of hand."

"They always do when it comes to Shinji." I sigh. I already knew what he was trying to say, and it almost made me blush. He liked it. So much that he kept going back for more. The same thing happened to me after my first time with Shinji. "So then how did you end up with Shuuhei?" I ask, glaring at him as some of my anger came back.

"I don't even know. He was waisted, I was too, and he was willing. I guess he and Kensei got into a fight and Shuuhei wanted to make him jealous, so technically I got used. But I deserve it. I know you really liked him, and I didn't want you to find out like that. I was going to tell you eventually.." He sighed again, and I felt my anger dissipate yet again. I never really could stay mad at him.

"I'll forgive you on one condition." I say, and evil idea coming to mind. But I was jealous and needed details. That lucky bastard got to fuck the best piece of ass in the world after all.

"Which is?" He asks, looking skeptical. He knows me too damn well.

"How was he?"

"... "

" Don't give me that face. I've always wanted to know how he is in bed. Is that tattoo all for nothing? Is his dick huge?"

"Ichigo!" He yells in mortification, face going red. That certainly gave me my answer.

"You lucky bitch! Ugh, I hate you so much. Do you think they'll fight again and he'll use me instead?" I ask, staring at him seriously for a moment before we both broke out laughing.

"You're such a fucking fruit, I swear." He says, leaning back and looking at the sky.

"So are you, hypocrite." I say back, admiring all the stars and the crescent moon. We stay like that for a moment longer before a cold breeze passes by and we decide to go back inside. It's at least two in the morning and we should probably go to sleep anyways. Before he hops into the closet, he looks at me with a serious face.

"So we're good, right?" He asks, and I smile slightly at him.

"Always." I reply, and he grins before shutting the door. I finally get comfortable in my bed and close my eyes, thinking about everything that happened today. It was still a shock and would take some getting used to, but I'm glad we're still the same. It really scared me when I thought he liked me. That would just be so weird. Plus it would ruin everything.

Maybe now we could go back to normal and he won't have to hide anymore.


	6. Chapter 6

_Grimmjow and I did go back to normal, for a few days that is. In the beginning I told you we had sex, right? Well, that happened about a week from now, so we're getting closer to it. A lot of things happened within this week. It might be hard to understand because it happens so fast, hell even I still have a hard time understanding it, but try to keep up. After Grimmjow came out to me we continued our lives like normal. Shinji was planning a party for next week, which happened to be Graduation night. You see the connection there, right? Graduations in a week, me and Grimmjow fuck in a week, get it? But I'll talk about that later. For now, let's focus on when shit started to get weird. In class I would get the feeling like I was being watched, and eventually noticed Grimmjow eyeing me, but he would always quickly look away. He also stopped paying so much attention to every bitch in school. That's when I really got alarmed. _

…

It was lunch time when I first started getting suspicious. Halibel was wearing a super short skirt, something Grimmjow would usually comment on, but he didn't even bat an eyelash at her. Yoruichi had come up to our table and sat right in his lap, whispering something in his ear. Instead of smirking like the smug bastard he is, he grunted and totally dismissed her. This probably shocked me more than anything. I mean yeah, I get he's not talking to her after everything that happened, but to completely ignore her like that? It's so..un-Grimmjow-like. I knew something was up, and I wasn't the only one.

"Dude, did you just blow her off?" Renji asked, pure disbelief written on his face. Everyone else at our table looked the same way.

"Yeah, what of it?" Grimmjow replied, sounding pretty unamused. He either didn't want the attention or didn't see why it was a big deal. Probably the latter.

"What do you mean _what of it_? That's _Yoruichi_! You always jump at the chance to hit that, what's up?"

"Nothing's _up_, jackass, I got tired of fucking her. She's not even tight anymore, it feels like I'm fucking air. Besides, she's into some shit that I can't deal with." Grimmjow replied, and I knew what he was referring to. I didn't blame him for ignoring her, he had good reasons, it was just weird to see.

"Oh, like that BDSM shit?" Renji asked, and I had to hold back a laugh. He had no idea. "That's pretty fucked up man. I get why you don't want her anymore. But what about Rangiku? Gin disappeared again and she's been staring at you this entire time." He pointed out, and I noticed he was right. She was looking at Grimm like he was her prey.

"Che, like she's any better. I don't want Gin's sloppy seconds."

Now _that_ caused a reaction.

"Are you sick?" Chad asked. Come on, even_ Chad_ said something. That's how you know it's serious.

"No, I'm not fucking sick Chad."

"Are you sure?" Uryu asked. Even Uryu! I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Did Grimmjow really just say that?

"Yes, I'm sure, you four eyed prick." Grimmjow was even getting defensive over this, which rarely happened. He has to be hiding something. But what? He just told me everything a few nights ago, unless he left something out. But he wouldn't do that..would he?

"Since when does it matter whose sloppy seconds you get? I didn't know you even thought about things like that." Rukia commented, earning a glare from Grimmjow. She had a point though.

"Is it cause you swing the other way now?" Renji asked, ever the blunt one. Grimmjow's new preference had just barely started making its way around school, and needless to say everyone was shocked. But they didn't dare say a word about it. Grimmjow would kill anyone who even thought about messing with him. Renji however was dense and didn't quite _get_ things.

"I don't _swing the other way_, shit head, and it's none of your business anyways. Now can you all fuck off?"

"Someone's testy. What, do you love someone now? Is that it?" Oh Renji, when will you learn to shut the fuck up?

"It makes sense! Grimmjow loves someone, that's why he keeps turning everyone down!" Orihime said, smiling like an idiot. She _definitely_ wouldn't learn to shut her mouth.

"Alright, fuck all of you, I'm out." Grimm said angrily, standing abruptly and storming away. I sighed, fixing all of them with a pointed look. Didn't they know how stupid that idea sounded? Grimmjow has never_ loved_ someone, and probably never will. He didn't care enough to get so invested in a relationship. Hell, he's never been in a real relationship. He makes fun of me for actually dating people.

"You guys couldn't just let it go, could you?" I asked, mentally excluding Orihime. I couldn't really expect anything from her.

"What? Don't act like you aren't thinking the same thing. Something's clearly wrong with him. Has he told you anything?" Rukia asked, always wanting to know everyone's business. That was one thing I didn't like about her.

"He_ is_ acting weird, anyone can see that, but love has nothing to do with it. Grimmjow doesn't love. And no, he hasn't said anything. It's his business anyways, not ours." I said, feeling somewhat like a hypocrite. I wanted to know just as much as they did. Which is why I decided to go after him. I knew exactly where he was, and it was somewhere he only goes when he really needs a break. The roof of the school. After climbing the stairs and making sure no teachers saw, I opened the door and sure enough, he was leaning on the rail at the edge. He heard the door close but didn't turn around, so I quietly stood next to him. Unlike the others, I wasn't going to harass him. If he wanted to tell me then he would.

"You ready for Shinji's party?" He asks, and I have to smile at how typical he's being. Focus on partying, Grimmjow, that always works.

"Yeah, but I'm more ready to graduate. You're passing, right?" I ask, thinking maybe that's the problem. Grimmjow isn't really good at school, and since it's our last year, there's more pressure to pass.

"Of course I am. I managed to keep all of my C's."

"Good enough." I say, not surprised at his grades. At least he'll graduate. So then why is he being so weird? He stays quiet for a bit, and I notice he's biting his bottom lip. That's not a good sign. I really want to ask, but he'll probably get pissed. I've never seen him like this.

"You ready for high school to end?" He asks, finally deciding to say something. Is that the problem? He doesn't want to leave? No, he would definitely want school to be over.

"Hell yeah, are you?"

"Yeah..there won't be any more parties though." He says, sounding somewhat sad. That has to be it! He thinks there won't be any more parties, and then he'll be bored.

"Sure there will. Shinji won't leave us alone that easy. I'm sure he'll be sending out invites every week like usual. You know how he is."

"Yeah..you're probably right." He says, still sounding depressed. Ugh, what the hell is going on? Fuck it, no more pussyfooting around, I need answers. If he gets mad then so be it.

"Alright, what's wrong with you?" I ask, and he immediately tenses up. "You're acting weird."

"No I'm not." He denies, defenses already up. I sigh at his stubbornness.

"Yeah, you are. I get turning down Yoruichi, but Rangiku too? And you're acting all sad, but it can't be because school's ending. You know the parties won't stop. So what is it then?"

"Like I said before, it's my business." Ugh, I hate when he gets like this. But I'm just as stubborn as he is, and I want answers.

"So you won't tell _me_ either? What about everything we talked about? We're good now, you can tell me anything."

"Not this."

His answer stumped me. What could he possibly be hiding that even I couldn't know about? Whatever it was, it gave me a bad feeling. Grimmjow didn't keep secrets, especially from me. Well, except for the whole being bi thing, but he eventually came clean. But this was obviously different. Dammit, I hate secrets and he knows it.

"Did you get someone pregnant?" I ask, hoping to God that wasn't true. The last thing this world needs is more Grimmjows.

"No, dammit, now leave me alone!" He yells, grabbing me by the shirt and glaring at me. I have to pause and stare at his hands to make sure I'm seeing right. Yep, he's grabbing my shirt pretty aggressively. That's a fighting move. We haven't been in a situation like this in..I don't even know how long. But instead of a fight, the weirdest thing happens. He looks surprised for a moment, like he didn't even realize what he was doing, and then..quickly drops me and looks away. He goes back to leaning on the rail and biting his lip, leaving me dumbfounded. What the hell was that? I might have seen wrong..but I swear he was blushing. But why? That couldn't be true.

"Grimmjow.." I say, not quite sure where to go with this. Something really was wrong.

"Just go." He says, and for once, I let it go and walk away. I've never seen him like this, it's so weird and I don't know what to do. I really needed answers though. Unfortunately, I had to wait a whole week to get them, and it was the last thing I expected.

* * *

><p>It was after graduation at Shinji's party. I was beyond happy to finally be done with school, and everyone was in a good mood. It was probably the biggest party Shinji's ever had, which meant one thing. Tonight would be chaotic. We had only been here an hour and people were already drunk. I however wanted to remember tonight for once, considering it was special. Call me a sap, but it's true. So I stuck to lean and weed, but not too much like before. Grimmjow however was downing shots and smoking joints like his life depended on it. More strange behavior. He was also avoiding me like the plague, and I was getting pretty damn tired of it. To make it worse, Shinji wouldn't leave me alone.<p>

"Grimmy seems distant, ne? I wonder why." He said in that annoying tone, like he already knows the reason. But that can't be possible. Not even Shinji could know why he's been acting like this…could he?

"Go away." I said, not wanting anything to do with him. He only wanted one thing from me, but he wasn't getting it this time.

"Aw, don't be like that love. I miss you. No one else fucks as good as my berry-tan." He says, taking another sip of what I can assume is lean. I'm already feeling its effects, but it's hard to enjoy it while he's here.

"I'm not yours, and I don't care. Go bother someone else." I say, trying to find Grimmjow who had disappeared at some point.

"Mah, I suppose you're not mine anymore. You belong to Grimmy now."

"What?" I ask, wondering if I heard that right. The music was pretty loud after all. Did he just say I belong to Grimmjow? What the fuck did that mean?"

"You heard me. After _last time_, Grimmy's been different. He watches ya like a hawk. Don't tell me you haven't noticed?" He asks. I have noticed, I guess, but..that can't be right. "Ah, I see, you can't believe it. Well it's the truth hun, I would know. Why else would he be avoiding you and everyone else who wants his dick? He only wants you, but he doesn't want you to know."

"You..You're drunk. That's impossible." I said, starting to feel dizzy. I couldn't tell if it was from drugs or the disturbing idea of Grimmjow wanting me.

"Ah, but this is lean I'm sipping, how could I drink alcohol too? I'm well aware of what I'm saying dear, and I'm right. Take it from an expert. Grimm has developed some unwanted feelings for you and is trying his best to hide it. But if you don't believe me, you could always ask him yourself."

"You're wrong." I growl, taking a rather large sip of lean and walking away. I get about halfway across the floor when everything starts spinning in slow motion. All of the colorful lights, the way the music makes my body vibrate, all of the moving bodies, it all makes my head spin. I drop the joint I had been holding. My heart starts beating fast and I lose balance, stumbling in place and letting out a laugh at how dumb I must look. But fuck, I don't care. I try to keep walking but I can't even tell if I'm moving or not, everything is going so slow. That's when I notice the hands on my hips and the breath on the back of my neck.

Somehow I managed to look back, and when I see who it is, I damn near have a heart attack. Those smoldering gray eyes, that sexy as fuck smirk, and that fucking 69 tattoo are in front of me. Shuuhei pulls me closer and nips at my neck, and heat shoots down to my groin. I notice Kensei glaring a little ways away. They must have had another fight! Which means it's finally my turn to get used by this God of a man. Fuck yeah!

"You look a little lost. The bedrooms that way." He says, voice husky and deep in my ear. Damn, I love his voice! I let him lead me upstairs, grinning like a drunk idiot, even though technically I was really high. I hear a door close and suddenly we're on a bed and he's on top of me. This is a fucking dream come true!

"Clothes. Off. Now." I growl, and he laughs at my eagerness but complies anyways. I'm pretty sure I'm drooling as I watch, eyeing his body like a piece of meat. My own clothes fly off and I realize how much of a whore I'm being for him. As if I care. I black out for a second, but when I come back he's already inside of me and thrusting hard. I've wanted this for so long! So then why do I feel like something's wrong? Wasn't there something I was going to do?

_"Grimm has developed some unwanted feelings for you and is trying his best to hide it. But if you don't believe me, you could always ask him yourself."_

Why am I thinking about Grimmjow right now? There's no way he loves me, that's crazy. I should be enjoying this. It's Shuuhei, for fucks sake! But I can't shake the feeling..that I'm missing something.

"You know, I thought you were taken. Glad to see otherwise," Shuuhei says, and it takes me a minute to realize what he said.

"Well I thought the same about you." I reply with a smirk, beyond glad that he and Kensei chose tonight to argue. Today was awesome.

"Eh, I still am I guess. But that doesn't matter. I'm wondering about you and Grimmjow." He says, and just like that the bad feeling in my gut comes back.

"Wait, why Grimmjow?" I ask, wondering what gave Shuuhei that idea. Grimm and I never acted like a couple, so why would he think we were together?

"Well, since he's gay or whatever now and so are you, and you two are so close, I figured you'd be all over him. Plus after what Shinji said.."

"What did Shinji say?" I ask in a low voice, completely forgetting about sex for once. This wasn't good, not at all.

"Oh, you don't know? Oops..Uh, well, he kinda told everyone about that foursome you guys had with Yoruichi. Er..wait, I shouldn't be telling you this. You should really talk to him about it." Shuuhei said, and I felt myself begin to shake with a mixture of fear and anger. Everyone knew? This entire time, everyone has known? That bastard wasn't supposed to tell anyone!

"I'm going to kill him." I say, getting dressed sloppily and making my way downstairs, completely leaving behind my fantasy. This was more important. I find Shinji and immediately grab him by the shirt and slam him against the wall, gaining a lot of attention. I didn't care.

"What the fuck did you do?!" I yell, clenching his shirt so tight my knuckles are white. I've never been so angry at a party.

"What do you mean?" He asks, that stupid smirk of his ever present. I didn't even register my fist slamming into the wall next to his head.

"Don't fuck around! Why did you tell everyone about that night, we made a deal!"

"Oh, that. Well I couldn't resist after the display you and Grimmy dear gave me. I must say, I never knew there was so much sexual tension between you two. But you made it clear that night. Ah, but you don't remember do you? That was the plan, after all. You didn't want to remember."

"What. Happened." It wasn't a question. By this point we had everyone's attention, and it was too quiet for my liking. But this couldn't wait. What happened that night? I know I blacked out, but I thought all Grimmjow and I did was kiss.

"It would be easier to tell you what didn't happen. You and Grimmjow didn't have sex..barely. There, that's it."

"The fuck does that mean?!" I yell. My patience was gone at this point, and everything that came out of his mouth made me feel worse. We barely didn't have sex? So we came close to it?

"After you two kissed, it escalated rather quickly. In fact Yoruichi and I were left to watch as you two became more involved with each other. I believe you jerked him off and he gave you head, or maybe it was the other way around. My memories a bit fuzzy. There was quite a bit of kissing, more than what we agreed on. I'm not the only one who didn't follow the plan." He grinned, and I would have punched him if I didn't feel so sick. To think, I'm the last one to find out. Unless..

"Does Grimmjow know about this?"

He pauses, and then, "Of course he does. I told you earlier, he developed feelings for you that night. Why else would he act so odd?"

I felt like the world around me was falling apart. Grimmjow told me he blacked out that night. Did he lie? Or did he remember days later? Either way, he's known about this, and I'm the only one left out. I can't believe..Grimmjow and I..we're like brothers! I need to get out of here, I need to get as far away as possible. This is humiliating, it's sick, it..changes everything. Grimmjow and I can't recover from this. Nothing will ever be the same.

"Oh, I like that look." Shinji says, and I realize I'm hyperventilating. I shove away from him and start running, the world blurring around me as I leave the orphanage. This is the worst thing that's ever happened. Why didn't he tell me? How could we even let this happen? I've never been attracted to him, have I? I mean he's good looking and all but..I've known him forever! It's wrong! But then why did I do it? Why did I..what did I even do to him? Touch him? Kiss him? Did he really give me head or did I..?

"Shit!" I curse, swallowing the vomit that started to rise. How could I not remember this?

"Ichigo!" I hear someone yell, and I instantly run faster when I realize who it is. Grimmjow was actually following me. He must have seen the whole thing. I don't even want to look at him. Does he really love me? Is that why he's been acting like this? It makes sense..but that's not the reason I wanted! That's the worst possible reason! I can't love him back..I don't..do I? We've always been close, but like this? Ugh, I can't think right now! I need to focus on running.

"Dammit Ichigo, wait!" He yells, and I gasp as I realize he's gotten closer. He's faster than me, of course he would catch up! The guy plays football!

"Leave me alone!" I yell back, shutting my eyes tight as I hear his footsteps get closer. The air suddenly whooshes from my lungs as he tackles me and we roll down the hill by the river. We land in the shallow waters, him pinning me down, but I refuse to open my eyes. How can I even look at him now? We both try to catch our breath, feeling exhausted from the run and from the drugs still in our system. I know he's probably drunk. The water is fucking cold and I just want to go home.

"Ichigo look at me." He says, sounding more desperate than I expected. Against my will my eyes snap open. The sight of him makes my heart hurt and my stomach clench. How could this happen? This was all so wrong, and would never be fixed. Everything was ruined.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I ask, hating how weak I sound. I can't help it though. I'm angry, shocked, betrayed, and humiliated. I'm high as fuck and can barely control myself.

"How could I? It took me a few days to remember, and then I found out from Shinji all of the details. I didn't know he told everyone though..dammit, this wasn't supposed to happen!"

"What _was_ supposed to happen, Grimmjow, because I still don't even know everything. I'm the last fucking person to know about this! How could you do this?!" I yell, voice cracking at the raw emotions that wanted to come out. But I needed to hold back. I wasn't going to cry like a bitch in front of him.

"I didn't plan it! That night..I was just as fucked up as you. I had no idea it even happened! But then..it started coming back and I knew if I told you it would ruin everything. A kiss is one thing, but what we did..there's no going back."

"When did you start having feelings for me?" I ask, and he freezes at that. I guess he wasn't expecting me to know.

"Only..a few days ago. That's why I was acting weird. I didn't want to believe it..but it's true. I fucked everything up, Ichigo." He says, rolling off of me and sitting in the water, looking utterly defeated.

"Grimmjow..what exactly did we do?" I ask, dreading the answer but needing to know.

"Ichigo, I don't think you want to know."

"Tell me. I deserve at least that." I say, and he takes a deep breath before looking at me. I can tell by the look in his eyes that this is going to be hard, and I don't know how to feel. I want to know..but then what? I still have to figure out if I love him back..

"We should go back home. This isn't the place to talk about it."

I could only nod in return.

* * *

><p><strong>Woo! Long chapter. This story is actually almost done, I'm surprised. Hopefully this chapter didn't suck, I'm pretty tired so it might be a bit crappy. But at least it's done.<strong>


	7. Chapter 7

_I don't think I need to say much at this point. Tonight is the night that everything happens, you're officially caught up. Now, you might be saying, we already know how it ends. And yeah, you do. Well, sort of. You know part of it. But there's still some things left that are important. The sex, obviously, which happens to be my favorite part. I'm a pervert, of course it is. But it's not just sex…well, I won't spoil it. Let's just continue where we left off._

_..._

The walk back home was quiet. It had to be almost three in the morning, we were the only ones out. We climbed through my window, I sat on my bed while Grimmjow nearly collapsed into my desk chair. We both had grim expressions, eyes hazy from drugs and alcohol. Despite that, I felt pretty sober. This situation was just too serious to feel fucked up. Well, I still felt fucked up, just in a different way. What had Grimmjow and I done? The guy's like my brother, so then why do I feel…different? Brothers don't kiss. Brothers don't have sex with other people together. Brothers don't fuck each other, or do whatever the hell we did. Neither do friends. So then what are we now? Especially since he likes me…

"Are you sure about this? I mean…it's a lot, Ichigo." Grimmjow says, and I can hear the hesitancy. He's probably thinking if he tells me, I'll hate him or something. I really don't know how I'll feel at the end of this. I'm already so confused…which is why I have to know everything.

"Just tell me. I remember us kissing…" I trailed off, nearly blushing at the memory. I had actually been checking Grimmjow out while he fucked Yoruichi. And he knew it, too, yet he didn't say anything. Then when we finally did kiss…I…Shit, I came just from kissing him? Does that mean I like him? Ugh! I'm making it more complicated for myself!

"Yeah..well, shit started happening immediately after that. I don't know how you always pick the perfect time to black out." Grimmjow sighed, running a hand through his messed up hair. He looked uncomfortable, but I was too. This was pretty awkward. It's like asking someone 'Oh hey, I know you're my friend and all, but I kinda need you to tell me in detail what we did to each other while I lost control of myself. That's cool, right?' Except it's totally not fucking cool.

"I wouldn't call it perfect." I reply, though he was kind of right. But I wished I would have just remembered it myself. Things would be different right now…sort of. I don't know, actually. "So what happened?"

"Well…we pretty much decided to say fuck you to Shinji and Yoruichi, though I don't think they cared. They just watched the whole time and probably took pictures…fuck, I didn't even think about that. Anyways, we started…doing shit. Kissing and stuff. You were really out of it and I was right behind you. You..uh…you started…"

"Did I suck you off, or was it the other way around? Shinji mentioned that." I say, since he was clearly having problems continuing. He was openly blushing now, as was I, and I'm pretty sure I've never seen him like this. In another situation, I would take the time to enjoy it. But not now.

"You…did it to me. I started…touching you." Grimmjow cleared his throat, becoming more and more uncomfortable.

"You jerked me off, then. What else happened?"

"We both came, kept going like that until we came again, and then you got on top of me. You were saying crazy shit, you had no idea what was going on. You said you wanted me to fuck you. We were about to, but then you finally passed out. I kicked Shinji and Yoruichi out, got dressed, fixed you up and carried you home. Or..that's the gist of what happened, I can't remember much after you passing out."

"So..we didn't have sex. That's..good." I say, finding some relief in that fact. But still, I sucked him off twice, and he…I can't believe it. How the fuck did all of this happen? Everything's changed now. Grimmjow likes me…We still need to figure that out, too. Are we still gonna be friends? Do I like him back? I must feel something for him, after everything. I've kissed him how many times? I had his dick in my mouth, for fuck's sake. And despite everything, I don't want to lose him. I know I feel something…

"Yeah, I know. Look, Ichigo, I'm…really sorry about all of this. I've kept too much shit from you over this last month and I've done shit to you while you were out of it. I took advantage of you. And now…I just, I don't know. Everything's ruined." He said, looking down at his feet dejectedly. I felt a pang of sadness in my heart at seeing him like this.

"Everything's not ruined." I say, and he snaps his head up to look at me. "We've been tight since we were kids, Grimmjow. You're the only person I trust with my fucking life. You're like family…Just a different kind, now. I can't really look at you like a brother anymore, or a friend. But I really don't want to lose you. So…you have to be something, right?"

"Ichigo…what are you saying?" He asks cautiously, and I can see the hope in his eyes. I want to give him hope, but how can I when I'm still unsure?

"I don't know…Things are different, I can't deny that. I just don't know what kind of different. I'm…confused."

He looks like he wants to smile, but holds it back, and then suddenly looks serious again. "Let me help you, then. If you don't know how you feel, I'll show you at least how I feel about you, and maybe it will help. I can't lose you either, Ichi. Especially after everything."

"What do you mean?" I ask, feeling suddenly nervous, but in a good way. He stands and kicks off his shoes, sitting next to me on my bed. I know damn well what he means, but I want to hear him say it. I know Grimmjow. His actions speak louder than his words. If he loves me, he'll show it the only way he knows how, and it's something he's damn good at by now.

"Let's have sex. I'll show you how I feel, and if you end up not feeling the same…we'll figure something out. Just…just let me try, okay?" He sounds desperate, something I'm not used to but I understand. I'm like him, anyways. If I want to show a guy or a girl how I feel, sex is the answer. We're both terrible with words. I don't have a problem with this, even though this time it's Grimmjow. Guess that's another give away that I like him too. But I have to be sure…and I'm not turning down sex with Grimmjow. Everyone else has gotten a taste, now it's my turn.

"Okay." I nod in agreement, feeling a little jittery from being so nervous. But when he kisses me, it doesn't feel weird. It never really has, come to think of it. It almost feels natural. This is the first time we've done this alone, and the most sober, yet it feels the same as before. It feels pretty damn good. He starts taking off my clothes and I do the same to him, taking time to appreciate his body. I've never really had the chance to be this close to it before and actually remember it. I reach down to unzip his pants and find that he's already hard.

"Sorry, you're just too sexy for your own good." He says with a smirk, causing me to scoff and look away with a blush.

"I thought you didn't like talking during sex."

"This is different." He says, and I can't help but agree with him. I've had sex with a lot of people, but it's never really made me feel like this. Even when I finally had my chance with Shuuhei, I wasn't this…happy. We finally manage to take off all of our clothes and then he pushed me onto my back, my head resting on my pillow. He kisses me slowly, but there's the familiar roughness behind it that Grimmjow always has. His hand runs through my hair while the other holds up his body, our cocks rubbing against each other. I'm hard by now and I know he fucking loves how easy it was to get me here.

He breaks the kiss and puts two fingers against my lips. I take them into my mouth and suck on them, tongue running over the tips to tease him. He growls, voice low and harsh, and grinds his hips against mine. I moan at the friction it creates and watch how his eyes darken. I've always liked his eyes, there are so many shades of blue and they display his emotions easily. Or maybe I'm just good at reading them.

"Fuck, you really are a tease." He says, biting his lip as my tongue coats each finger with spit. He takes them out and reaches for my ass, and then starts prepping me slowly. I arch as his finger enters me, used to the feeling yet loving the way he does it. I've seen Grimmjow in action, and he isn't gentle. Yet he's doing it for me. Not that I need it, but damn does it feel good.

"Is that a well-known fact?" I ask, wondering what Grimmjow has heard about me. God knows how many things people have told me about him.

"Actually yeah, it is, and you were a tease that night too. Took your time sucking my dick, it was fucking torture." He says, and my body heats up at the way he talks. "I've heard you like dirty talk too, but that's a lesser known fact."

"Well it's fucking true." I growl, the sound turning into a moan as he inserts another finger and begins scissoring me. "I've heard plenty about you too. Like that you like it rough." I say, running my nails down his back and bucking my hips. He groans and I feel him shiver, fingers slamming into me harder than before. I gasp, loving the way he finger fucks me, finding my prostate all too easily.

"I also like giving it rough, and you enjoy it."

"No one ever does it right." I say, grinning as his fingers continue hitting my spot over and over.

"We'll have to fix that, won't we?" He asks, removing his fingers and positioning himself at my entrance. Without hesitating he slams into me and I have to cover my mouth to stifle the sudden moan. Jesus Christ, he's fucking good. He has less experience with guys than I do and he's already fucking perfect at it. Nobody's ever made me feel this good. "Fuck, you're tight, even after years of taking it up the ass."

"Fuck you, I fucking better be tight." I say, having the decency to blush. Did he assume I was a loose whore or something? I mean…okay, maybe a little. I'm kinda surprised I'm still tight. That's good though, I wanna be tight for him.

"You might not be when I'm done with you." He says, pulling out only to slam back into me. I cry out again, hoping to God we don't wake someone up. This would be awkward to explain.

"Are you saying you're going to be done with me at some point?" I say, slightly breathless from his administrations. He suddenly stops, smirks at me, and then goes at an agonizingly slow pace. He kisses me gently, tongue entering my mouth and sliding against mine. The way he's being so slow and gentle sends powerful, hot waves of desire straight towards my already throbbing cock.

"Let me think about that.." He says, sliding out of me all the way only to push back in, still going slow as fuck. I almost whine, needing more. "Nah, you feel better than anything I've ever had. I'm never gonna be done. That is unless you want me to be."

"Fuck no, you're the only fucking person who knows what the fuck to do, now go fucking faster!"

"Damn, someone's got quite the vocabulary. Didn't you pass English?" He says, clearly waiting for me to beg. And damn, I like someone who makes me beg.

"Grimmjow," I damn near whine, gripping his shoulders and arching into him, "Faster, please!"

"Shit." He says, looking surprised that I actually did it. He then resumes slamming into me mercilessly, leaning in to bite at my neck. I hold onto him for dear life as he fucks me so hard I wonder if my bed can take it. At this rate I won't last long. I've never had someone bring me this close so fast. I wrap my legs around his hips, moaning like a fucking slut and loving every second of it. "You're fucking perfect, Ichigo." He says, voice low next to my ear. I shiver at the way he says my name.

"I could say the same for you. Keep it up and I'm going to fucking explode."

"Good, cause I'm about there too." He says, looking into my eyes and holding my hands above my head. To think I'm actually having sex with Grimmjow. But looking into his familiar eyes, I know it's true. And I know how I feel now.

"Grimmjow, I don't want this to end." I say, and he looks confused for a moment. "What, you don't wanna come yet? I can fix that."

"No, stupid, I mean_ this_. Us being together like this."

"So you like me back?" He asks, looking like the cute, hopeful idiot he is. I roll my eyes and smile, pulling him in for a kiss. "I don't like you, Grimm, I love you." I say, gasping as his thrusts become erratic. "And I'm about to fucking come."

"Heh, love you too. Now come for me already." The fact that Grimmjow actually said it out loud is what drove me over the edge. I've never heard Grimmjow say that before, because he's never loved anyone. To think, he finally said it, to me. He fills me up with his hot come and pulls out, leaving a mess behind. He rolls off and lays next to me, trying to recover his breath.

"You look hot when you come." I say, looking at him with a smirk. He laughs and smacks me in the head, looking more sated than I've ever seen him.

"Back at ya." He replies, and we lay there like that for what seems like forever. I feel myself getting sleepy, knowing it's probably really late.

"Should we even try to hide this? Dad's going to come in here when he wakes up." I ask, wondering how my family will take this. It's a bit of a shock, for sure.

"I'm sure they already know something's up, Ichi. Your bed isn't quiet and neither are you."

"Shut up! It's not my fault you're so fucking good. I've never felt like this before." I say with a blush, hoping I didn't just wake everyone up.

"I know what you mean. I feel like I've been trying to find the person who will actually satisfy me, but it's been you all along. Who woulda thought?" He says with a chuckle, pulling me into his arms. I'm happy to know he feels the same, and that I actually satisfied him. I don't even care what anyone will say about this, I'm happy and so is he, that's all that matters.

"Oi, you falling asleep on me?" He asks, and I only manage to grunt in response. Grimmjow is warm and really comfortable and I've had an exhausting day. "Che, cute. Night then, my little berry."

"Shut..up.."

_When we woke up, it was to my Dad passed out on the floor and my sisters trying not to laugh at us. They accepted it, of course, because they love us. Our friends were shocked but they didn't treat us any different. We still went to Shinji's parties and got fucked up, but instead of trying to fuck whoever was willing, we would always sneak away and fuck each other. It was the first time both of us ever felt complete. I'm sure you want to know what happened after that, right? Well…_

"Oi, the hell you writing over there, Ichi?" Grimmjow asked, having been watching his lover for quite some time. He looked over Ichigo's shoulder and read a few sentences, eyes widening in realization. "Why are you writing about that? Not that I mind…It's a great story."

_It's been twenty-three years since then, and we're still together. We moved out a few years after graduating and got a nice little apartment. I went to school and followed in my Dad's footsteps to become a Doctor, and Grimmjow owns his own bar, believe it or not. He's interested in business and wants to go back to school. _

"I don't know, I just felt like writing it down. Might even try to get it published. People love a good angsty porno, right?" Ichigo says with a laugh, not quite sure why he felt the need to write down his best memory. "If we ever adopt a kid, I just…want to tell them this story. A cleaner version, of course."

_We got married about eight years ago and have been living happily together as a couple. We weren't sure if we would make it this long at first, everyone says high school romances never make it. But we did. I've known him all my life, it just seems right to be with him like this. _

"Heh, good luck making that clean. Did you mention how much you like my cock? That's important." Grimmjow said, kissing Ichigo on the neck. Ichigo blushed, even after all these years of dealing with Grimmjow.

"Shut up, you egotistical bastard."

"Aw, don't be like that. You know it's true." He says, playing with Ichigo's longer orange hair.

"Just like I had you begging for mine last night?"

"Damn right. I'll do it again right now."

_We're not the same crazy kids as we used to be, of course, but our personalities haven't changed that much. We're mature, obviously, but we still enjoy sex just as much as before. We still joke around and swear like teenagers, but we're happy, and that's always the most important thing. _

Ichigo closed the notebook and set down his pencil, deciding to take a break and humor his husband. Grimmjow noticed the title Ichigo scribbled on with a sharpie and raised an eyebrow.

"Why did you call it Questions?" He asked, climbing over the couch to lay on top of Ichigo.

The orangenette grunted at Grimmjow's weight, "Because I had a lot of them back then. It felt like the entire last few months of senior year were filled with them. But I got my answers now."

"Oh, do you? What are they?" Grimmjow asked with a knowing grin, as if he hadn't asked Ichigo a million times already. He just liked hearing it.

"That I love you and you love me, and that's all that matters." Ichigo answered, shaking his head at his idiotic lover who grinned back at him. "Now shut up and take me to bed."

"You're damn fucking right I'll take you to bed."

Grimmjow picked Ichigo up bridal style and carried him to their room, leaving behind the notebook filled with the story of their lives. He had no idea why Ichigo decided to write everything down, but he was grateful for it, because it was the best memory he had. And maybe someday they could retell it to their child, avoiding all of the bad parts and keeping it simple. Or maybe they would just wait until their kid was old enough. Either way, Grimmjow hoped it would happen.

Even if it didn't, he would still read it over and over again, treasuring it with Ichigo until one day they died together.

* * *

><p><strong>Aaaaaaand END! Well, I never planned on writing such a sentimental ending for this story, but here we are. I'm just glad I finally finished this. I actually wrote this like forever ago and had it posted but thanks to the damn admins it got taken down. I'm still hoping they don't do it again. If they do, I'll have to post it again. Ugh -_- Anyways, review and all that good stuff.<strong>


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